Herein begins a much challenging life for me from today onwards, & i'm taking it with expectations & optimisim.

Just got home from my sign lanuguage courses & i'm glad these past few months of practices were fruitful, i could attend the lessons with confidence, a far cry from what ocurred last year..

As of last year, due to poor time management, i never got the time to practice & always felt so slow & feeling super awkward(read unconfident) whenever the instructor call out one by one to sign..there was this particular lesson tt i had felt so terrible that i wanted to walk out of the class.. and i kinda attended 3 lessons & gave up..

Low self-esteem can seriously crippled a person's ability.. one year from then, i am still me, still having the same surname, 2 eyes& & 2 ears.. but yet, right now, i am looking forward to every lessons, obtained the cert & joined the ministry & probably be a volunteer in teaching the Hearing impaired children tution..

For viewerrs who happen to browse thru my blog: if u're interested in joining me in sign languages, do view the following website for more informations:

http://www.sadeaf.org.sg/

Friends have asked me why sign language..

Well, cause i want to live a life that is not for myself but a life is purposeful, if in this lifetime, i can make a difference, a positive impact to a person.. it will be all worthwhile..

In a Christian point of view, it might comes in handy when i go for mission trips and in a general point, being able to communicate with childrens who are born with or due to sickness becomes hard of hearing.. to let them know that physical disability does not rob them of their opportunity to carry out & live life like everybody elses..

a Pastor used to share this illustration:




" To that Starfish...i make a Difference"


I was greatly impacted.. day in & day out, all of us are busy with our lives, from busying studying to rushing projects to work to earn income to spending time with loved ones to having time to relax..

Time is a crucial factor to many of us.. to achieve as much as one could before wrinkles start appearing & before we got to carry a walking cane..

But if we were to grow old & to look back, what we will be in our mind?

"oh.. i manage to achieve XXX nos of distinctions for my subjects"

"My school project was being published in school"

"oh.. i attended xxx number of meetings"

"I earned $xxxxxx during my years of work"

" i got promoted from a ... to ... "

So?

So many "I"s.. to me, i do want to say the above statements, who doesn't but that's not my definition of living a meaningful life..

I am not a saint & i know i don't have as much compassion & capacity in comparison to Gandhi & Mother Teresa..

But as little as i could.. i wish to do something for those i know & contributing to bring a smile to others..


and i will try my very best to achieve all that i mentioned.. and my next plan for next half of the year after completion of sign language courses is to take up counselling classes..

Basically, this is how i keep my life going.. a goal to achieve, the sense of achievement is what stirs me when situation or human factors disappoints me..

Yupz, causes i had simply wasted too much of my time..during teenagers years, focusing on the wrong stuffs & always wanting my needs to be met & had felt that life owe me something..

Tomorrow's onwards gonna get busier, as there's major changes taking place at work, and i want to be able to contribute to a postive success of my working Company.. to observe & learn as much from those in the higher management.. & also to meanwhile balance well my studies as this work doesn't allow me to take too long a break during exam periods.. it's all Balancing and it cheers & motivates me as there are friends around me who are leading even much busier & doing a fabulous job of balancing commitments..

Everyone has their individual ways in encouraging themselves in tough moments..

As kiddish as it may sounds.. the following song is my other motivation source whenever i feel down, esp during those years of heartache.. since teenager yrs, i will constantly replay again & again & again this song when i had cried myself to sleep..periods where i had to go thru dark moments in life.. telling myself:





My Real source of motivation is as stated in my profile under my Loves, the very first stated..

Freak.. why i do keep attracting all the wrong kind of person??

Arghz.. i don't want the opposite attract theory to work on me in this type of situation..

Anyway, i know "u" visit my blog, so read this:

"go and find another person who can be your friend k.. there are so many cindys out there, think i'm not the correct that u looking for and so plsss save yr typing on yr msn & leave me alone.. thanks so much"

Phew..

Yesterday's sermon was indeed a revelation to many, esp the chinese.. since young, we were just taught to write the different characters and form it into sentences n writing composition & etc, but never kind of figure out the significance of each character, by breaking it up..for eg: 信 consists of 人字旁& 言..言 was further broken down but can't remember the exact contents though..

and

Based on the decomposition of each chinese characters, the history of christianity, from Genesis 1:1, was actually recorded in chinese history, based on the chinese characters..

Not only the revelation did i receive from today's sermon but also came the realisation of my poor chinese.. as certain words strokes were soo complicated..

Move on to Carl's Junior after service n it was a great time chatting with the members n hearing Jason sharing abt his past job n experiences n we had a great time laughing away n amused by what he shared..

Today's CNY eve & here's wishing everbody a Happy Chinese New Year, to have a joyous celebration with their family members..




When i was a kid till teenager years, my definition of CNY was basically a time to earn $$, how practical can i get indeed.. but tt was the truth.. i'm not a sociable person, going to relative house would mean eatin, watchin tv & awaiting for ang pos collection.. & continue watching tv,blending in with the sofa & no interactions with my cousins & then it would be back to home..

Evey year pass by and each year, i am getting more & more lethargic & less lookin forward to CNY, not tt i am being pessimistic but in apparent, being a current single @ 20plus, nt tt i am mourning over my status but it does feel really paiseh to take ang Pos from my relatives.. though they feel it's okay to give but the person collecting it does not feel okay taking it.. and i mean seriously..

And so this year, both on 1st & 2nd day of CNY, i will be working.. crazy it may sounds.. but don't blame it on my employer.. it's my own decision to go to work as i got tons of stuffs to do and it's more fulfilling than to stay @ home and be a couch potato..

Looking forward to February, where life will get even more occupied with the start of my sign language courses and thru the help of a friend, manage to obtain the contact of the talking Hand ministry member & hopefully will start serving in it soon.

Currently, while at home.. shall not waste my time stoning at the computer screen doing nothing, shall use this free time @ home to make the best out of time & thus i
still in the midst of online networkin.. & this is what one particular network website, personality profile of what my working style is:


Every person is unique, however, psychologist tell us that 90% of what we do is habitual.That each of us has a dominant pattern of behaviour where we feel comfortable most of the time.The dominant pattern ( Colour Style ) for High Green
means that:


"You are a logical well organized person who works slowly and methodically to produce accurate systems.

You need guarantees that you are in the right before you act and prefer to work at a slow pace to allow you to "process" all the information provided.

You work hard within existing circumstances to promote quality in your products and services that you work with.

When stressed you may withdraw and be resistant to change. You can be perceived as slow to act and unable to meet deadlines.

To help you increase your effectiveness High Greens must openly show concern and appreciation for others, occasionally try short cuts and time savers, and adjust more rapidly to change and disorganisation, work on timely decision making and initiating"

And truly, the results are pretty accurate..


It's been long tt i actually blog out my thoughts once again..got to clarify that the following are blogged in a stable usual normal mood(read:happy) as it seems that the pictures might mislead the readers.. keke.. as it seems like an emo post after including all the pictures..



How would u define a person who constantly take personality test to know oneself, used to know of a particular person who constantly take different kind of personality tests to have her answers.. it might be out of curiosity or the fact that one does not though her actual self..
funny though.. all these personality questions, isn't it computed by another person as well..

and everyone are born with different personalities, which makes the world less boring, thank God, HE did not do a cloning on us..there won't be a word "opinion" if everybody think or act alike..

and we humans behaviours are perplexed.. like..

Why does one tries to conceal her actual self?



Why does one feel that being happy in front of others when she is actually not is the strong way?



So when one cries or show her true emotions, consider weak?



Why does another behaves like an open book?




Is there a termed correct to one's personality?

and most of the time the answer seems to be the general answer.. sayin something that the majority disagree will make u seems that yrs is wrong..

That the correct personality shld be:

Vocal/outspoken. confident. charismastic. smart. communication is inborn.. or all..

& again does the opposite of it is term as weird or outcast?

Isn't that such the case in society?

Growing up, i guess everyone will remember in his or her class, there will always be this person who is despise by the rest of the classmates.. it might juz be tt person is extremely quiet, looks fugly or just a different race..

While that is the case.. everyone else becomes part of a face in the crowd.. however, some strive to outshine in this crowd, the exceptional talented, smart person n tt's where we have our talents in the govt dept to the business, to the entertainment..

n so there are 3 categories:

1. the outcast






2. the face in the crowd









3. the exceptional talents







That's where i begin to think.. ain't all 3 the same when they were just babies?

so where does the separation takes place?

In the genes of their parent?

In the country they were born?

the family background?

the education?

their choice of friends?

I used to have this classmate back in ITE.. she's 20.. however, her voice was those of a little kid n her behaviour n thoughts were one too.. n she often become the subject of bully & constant make fun of.. and i would often ponder.. what went thru her mind when hurting words were spoken n laughter of the class was focus on her.. nonethless, she's a postive gal or so i presume..despite tt, she will often laugh away with them & treat it as part of life..

does category 1 person is subjected to her mindset tt he/she is fixed to be like that & so no attempts to be a no 2 or they r in the midst of tryin..

i have not hear from my classmate ever since..


i should not include christanity as of yet..

Is there such a word fairness or unfairness in this world?

Yet, we know of individuals who despite their circumstances or frm outcast grew out to belong to the 3rd category..

Friends who know me since young or know me when i was a teenager will know i used to belong to category 1..

yupz.. tt's a past i'm not ashamed to share coz it's a testimony by itself..

thus my answer to my above question could not fit.. it's christanity that changes me..



the me right now,In terms of actual personality: i guess no one truly knows me well yet..

Some would term me as Quiet.. i was truly quiet way back then but now i would term it as "i-talk when necessary", prefering to listen most of the time.. there are times when i really do talk non-stop..fulfilling my 20,000 quota of words in a day..

i mean in a group, if everybody is competing to share their piece of mind or one interupting another constantly.. how chaotic will tt turn out..


Some would term me as simple..(again, back then, i truly was) but now... i would add a "but complicated" to it

and don't try to give me the standard correct answers for my questions cause seriously i won't take it..

can't continue too much though afterall this is a public blog.. any more contents & i will be an open book..

Realised i am easy tired n tend to lose concentration easily.. in lectures, after rushing from work to reach lesson on time, within 15 mins of listening despite the bitterness of coffee, i will still end up closing my eyes n mind slipping away.. forcing myself to wake up 5 mins later... n seriously unlike poly days where i allow myself to slip into dream mode only to wake up after lecture ends.. this time round, every lecture is essential to understand..

At work.. esp if i studied till late night till 1am before.. the best i can concentrate at work is till 630pm.. after which my brain will gradually shift into stand-by mode into Hibernating mode.. unable to think n thus unproductive.. this does get frustrating when there's workload to be done.. cld only pack up n go home n continue the next day..

This is what re-occur just today n yupz, it's causing all the frustration boiling in me right now this moment.. as stated in my 2nd prev entry..time is passing fast n i wish not to waste time achieving nothing..

N so.. i started to google on Brain food:

http://www.nootropics.com/smartfood/index.html:

According to nutritionists, the best foods for brainpower are:

Broccoli - *Yucks
Asparagus _yucks!
Tuna - shall add this as my breakfast..tuna sandwich!
Avocados - maybe it's juice
Cod - neh
Plaice - what!
Sprouts - Hell no!
Lettuce - my 2nd edible veg..
Mackerel - nahz..
Fresh fruit - this takes discipline in walking to the supermarket n myself 1 cup of fruits everyday..

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/4/T040400.asp:

Eat brain-friendly carbs. The rate at which sugar from a particular food enters brain cells and other cells of the body is called the "glycemic index" (GI) of a particular food. Foods with a high glycemic index stimulate the pancreas to secrete a lot of insulin , which causes the sugar to quickly empty from the blood into the cells; this produces the ups and downs of blood sugar and the roller coaster behavior that goes with them. Foods with a low glycemic index do not push the pancreas to secrete so much insulin, so the blood sugar tends to be steadier. Feeding your child carbohydrate foods with a low glycemic index is one way of helping him control his behavior and performance in school or at play. Foods with the best brain sugars include the following:

Fruits: grapefruit, apples, cherries, oranges, and grapes have a low glycemic index. Fruits have a lower G.I. than fruit juices, because the fiber in the fruit slows the absorption of the fruit sugar. A whole apple will be more brain-friendly than apple juice; a whole orange better than orange juice. Freshly-made juice containing a lot of pulp is more brain-friendly than filtered juice.

Cereals and grains: oatmeal and bran have the lowest G.I. Other foods with a favorable G.I. are spaghetti and rice. Corn flakes and sugar-coated cereals have higher G.I.s.

Vegetables and legumes: Legumes, such as soybeans, kidney beans, chick peas, and lentils have the lowest glycemic index of any food. Potatoes and carrots have a much higher G.I.

Dairy products: Milk and yogurt have low glycemic indexes, slightly higher than legumes, but lower than fruits. Plain yogurt has a lower glycemic index than yogurt with fruit preserves or added sugar

FOODS FOR THOUGHT: FOODS THAT BUILD AND FOODS THAT DRAIN THE BRAIN

BRAIN BUILDERS
Avocados
Bananas
Beef, lean
Brewer's yeast
Broccoli
Brown rice
Brussel sprouts
Cantaloupe
Cheese
Chicken
Collard greens
Eggs
Flaxseed oil
Legumes
Milk
Oatmeal
Oranges
Peanut butter
Peas
Potatoes
Romaine lettuce
Salmon
Soybeans
Spinach
Tuna
Turkey
Wheat germ
Yogurt

BRAIN DRAINERS

Alcohol
Artificial food colorings
Artificial sweeteners
Colas
Corn syrup
Frostings
High-sugar "drinks"
Hydrogenated fats
Junk sugars
Nicotine
Overeating
White bread

http://www.thefruitpages.com/students.shtml:

Fruit and the memory
Fruit has a very positive effect on the brains just like carrots. So if you want to stimulate your brain functions you have to eat much fresh fruit and carrots (raw).
One of the substances that fruit contains are natural sugars. They stimulate the brain so we can think faster and recall information more quickly. There are many other substances that fruit contains which scientists think they stimulate the brain. How this works and which substance is responsible for which effect is still unknown as of yet and research is done at this very moment.

Students: improve your exam results!
We would like to tell you more about how students can improve their results by changing their eating habits before they have an exam. Fruit is the ultimate brain fuel!
You can actually improve your test results simply by changing your eating habits between waking up and doing the exam. The big trick is to consume fruit effectively. Have only fruit but as much as you want before you do your test and avoid the brain blocking foods white flour, refined white sugar, meat and dairy.

Check it out yourself once and you'll notice that you can think much more clear and faster if you have only eaten the right and light stuff before the exam. Afterwards you can have whatever you want!

Fruit
The effect fruit has on your brain is that it makes you think faster and recall information more easily. This is only an example. There is much more to learn about nutrition. There is also nutrition that has a negative effect on your brains.

Brain blockers
Here is a list of things that have a negative effect on the functioning of the brains:

White flour, especially in combination with cheese. This forms a sticky substance in the intestines that costs much energy to digest. Much blood has to be sent to the digestive system so it cannot be sent to your head;
Refined white sugar;
Turkey; it contains a toxic element that has a strong tiring effect, it makes you sleepy;
The combination of proteins (meat) and starch (potatoes). These two foods are burnt in a different way. It will cost your body more energy to burn them together than apart from each other.
For more theoretical information see: Sugar in fruit.
Inform yourself
Not only fruit stimulates your brains, another type of food that does is carrots. Eat some raw carrots at least once a week to stimulate your memory.


A good memory is a joy for life!

*Okay, i'm so going to the NTUC to stock my fridge with tons of Fruits!


And guess the food one eats really matters.. even as i'm typing right now.. i'm beginning to stone away.. n staring @ the screen..


Label: So looking forward to cg CNY gathering tmr!!

It's really History in the making being this very date, 20 Jan 2009, for the Americans and the whole world.. Amercians are celebrating n we citizens from other countries are delighted with the techonology n pleased with the reporters that we can witness together with them of this memorable event..


Here i am, joining in the crowd in Singapore watching the Inaguration Ceremony online at CNN live for American's 44th President Barack Obama!!

Do check out to to his repeat telecast speech at http://edition.cnn.com/video/

the Americans are elated n full of belief as they attend n listen with attentiveness to Mr President's speech..

As for me,in terms of polictical aspect n knowledge, i am still of limited knowledge n can be @ times, too caught up with my own life..but yet
i can't help but to be interested in this newly elected president..

even not following the news closely everyday, one would know the influence of America, the role it play in every country..

All hopes are on this man who makes everyone turn his head, a man in the crowd might not know the previous presidents of America but right now, Mr President Obama's name is well known all over the world..

Like today, i believe this year is the highest number of people tuning in online to watch this inaugration..


late 2007 and current moment, things are not looking well for America, the sub-prime crisis, the wall street melt-down, the constant bailout on establised corporations and the shocking figure of retrenchment.. this is the time where all eyes are on Mr Obama to step in and make the difference, to pull up the economy, solve the wailing cries of the citizens n building stronger ties with other countries.. the burden is heavy on him n heaviness is just an under-statement..

An extract of his speech:

"..Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time," Obama told those gathered on the National Mall in front of the Capitol. "

"But know this, America -- they will be met,"


as a normal citizen in S'pore, i hope the expectations of everyone esp americans will be reasonable n be wise, as it does takes time for the economy n changes to take place.. n things don't change overnight.. it all takes time..

I am rooting in for this influencial, full of wisdom n selfless leader in America.

a Time to Ponder..

iT'S 14th Jan 2009 and how fast 14 days of a new year has just passed..

Had make a constant reminder tt i will not waste time as what i had done last yr n to decrease my proscratination..

Here r my Resolutions for 2009, had wanted to post it on the 1st Jan 2009 but had nt find the time to do so.. n while right nw as i m taking a break frm studying..here is it:



1. Pass my ACCA modules in 1st attempt for Jun & Dec'09 papers..

2. Continuance of Lessons of Sign Language..last yr, my time was in a mess n i had to postphone this but this yr, arm with a organiser, i checked tt this upcoming Sign language course commencing in Feb'09 did nt clash with my ACCA lectures.. Thank God for tt..

3. Hope to join Silent Ministry by Sep 2009.. was really disappointed when the last batch of recruitment was done last yr quarter but i was nt called..

4. Take up Wine Appreciation classes.. had mentioned this last yr in a particular post that my new found interest in Wines n also spur on by the lack of knowledge when working as a waitress..

5. Continuance to be effective n efficient @ work..shall elaborate on it in a future post..

6. Hope this yr, may single becomes double..

God willing n wise allocation of time, i really aim to achieve all of the above by end of 2009..

An additional insight.. chatted with someone recently n on learning his job, realised a job nature tt did not cross my mind before n realised this job is really so amazing, as in, the task handle is not paperwork nor figures nor equipments but humans.. n it's abt helping others as a full-time job, juz like the nature of a doctor, nurses n etc.. a term of a job tt seldom will knw the exact job scope till question were asked n research were done.. a job tt nt only consists of knowledge but Love n patient is what i cld term it as an outsider n it takes the person to elaborate more.. if i had known of such a course n job, i wld have considered twice on Accountancy back then as i realised i like jobs tt r nt only self-fulfilling but others fulfilling as well.. being able to make a difference in the life of a person..-Occupational Therapist.

That's the reason why i do enjoy talking to different persons, knowing abt their life n at the same time, learning new things everyday..

That's what makes Life Interesting!

Thoughts of the day: The Art of Contentment is something i have yet to comprehend..

Just had a new hair cut on sun and i simply love the colour and hair style,the hair stylist recommended by Joyce was indeed professional..



Nice??

Now a recap of what Christmas day & New Year..

oN New Year,Went down to Maggie's house with Mei Qi & Vivien on thurs and we had a delicious steamboat together, afterwhich it was a time of Monopoly & drinking at No.5..
Photos to be updated soon..

Photos of my christmas presents:










Ear-rings & eye-shadow frm Jane..& incls. of the pretty pink box..




Pouch from Sharon..



Ear-rings from Suan..





Hand-made pouches by Joyce..



Christmas card frm Joyce






Christmas card frm Jane







One of my fav,from Louisa, the design is what i am in love with.. it's just so me..& the comb juz so suits my fringe..





From my Bro, Royston..






Christmas X'change gift frm Shirley..







From Lihua, my closest friend at work..

End of picture gallery..

Next update will be on this sun, shall post about the meeting with Xiaowei of her belated Birthday Celebration..

A summary of what happens during the week:

14th: a blur Sotong day.. met up with my Poly frens to celebrate Xinyi's Birthday, had received a msg days earlier to meet @ Vivo Marche.. but self-assume me, did not read much of it's contents and so went to Suntec city, not knowing tt the Marche were no longer there for quite a while..

And to make the whole story short, went there to Vivo and have a time of eating & shopping..

Christmas Present from Belinda:



She gave the 5 five of us each perfume & i got my favourite which i had intended to buy & tt's the Flight of Fancy.. the purple cover.. i am so totally crazy over it!!





15th:

Met up with my long time-no-see good friends, Royston & Wenkai and their partners, we were ex-cg members and our friendship grew from there..
As everyone were busy with their individual lives and esp the both of them busy with their study & work & relationships, meeting them up often is rare and so decide to catch up with them this month and so we have our dinner at Thai Express @ Raffles City.. it was a good time of catching up.. Royston is due to graduate next yr frm NTU, wenkai & his fiance, ivory whom i meet for the first time shares abt the propose.. and we subseqently move on to New Asia Bar and i simply fell in love with place..




Check out their website:

http://www.equinoxcomplex.com/

The night view of singapore was beautiful and sadly we could not get a seat near the windows and had no camera to take the photos, but will visit that place againz soonz coz i simply love it..

19th:

Had a christmas celebration with the cg and boy it was a fun time:

Started by having some games, watching a show, carol time, eating, celebrating Jane's & Christopher B'day and photo takings..














Immediately, rush off to meet my colleagues at No. 5 for drinking sessions and move on to Balcony waiting for rajah to send me all the pics taken but meanwhile some pics taken with Li Hua:




Highlight!!: i'm not Drunk, just tt my eyes look so tired after having a whole day @ work, the cg christmas celebration and then drinking sessions..




20th:

Candlelight service.. Went with my cousin,Edwin & Zhirong for Sat svc and it was a great msg n when it was candle light time, the view where we were sitting had a good view:




Elaboration: since a few years ago, we started this christmas candle light svc, towards at the end of the msg,from the start of the stage, everyone will pass on the light, neighbours will light up one another's candle and Silent Night will be playing in the background..the view is beautiful as the lights were off and candles by candles start to lit up the darkness..




21th(today):

Suppose to go to the Zoo with my colleagues today but it was cancelled the last min and thus staying at home to surft the net, do my stuffs and blog!!


A rather happening week and i simply love it, haven had such a good time for a year and i am glad i manage to have lots of funz & rest during this Dec before a stressful semester begins next Jan, when it's back to mugging.. shall not mention much abt it, and am looking forward to this upcoming christmas week!!




Label: Right now, i am much happier as a single..doing things the way i want it to, & freedom is in my hands..